bandom-tfln:

(850): I’m not asking you to commit. I’m politely asking your penis to be my friend.

by sugar-crash31

bandom-tfln:

(203):

He’s a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way

bandom-tfln:

(845): Make me a sandwich

(301): The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I’ll make you a sandwich.

by sugar-crash31

bandom-tfln:

(519): Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you’re actually straight.

- jrho

bandom-tfln:

(865): I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.

by sugar-crash31

bandom-tfln:

(603): be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage

(Submitted by jrho, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(951): Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(419): That’s what I’m here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(416): How did it go last night?

(647): Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?

Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!

bandom-tfln:

(813): Penises. Everywhere.

(772): You’re. Welcome.

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(952): So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious

(781): Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(604): That was an excessively violent trivia night

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(678): This is the weirdest negotiation ever.

(814): This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(804): God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.

(Submitted by jrho, thank you!)

bandom-tfln:

(774): He likes bondage and spanking and shit. (508): Oh, so “normal” kinky not “I wanna pee on people” kinky. I can handle that.

(Submitted by sugar-crash31, thank you!)